A little programmers humor

[Beja]

A man wanted to borrow some money from a friend..

- Can I owe you a thousand dollars?
- Sorry I can't hear you.. you said what?
- Can----I----owe----you---- a thousand----Dollars"
- Still I can't hear you.. can you come to the other side, I hear you better..
and the man goes around and talk to him loud in his right year:
- Can I owe you two thousand Dollars?
- Oh, I think I can hear you better from the other side come back over here.

 

[Beja]

A programmer calls British Airways:

p- hello, I have a question
ba- yes!
p- how long it takes to travel from London to New York
ba: ok just one minute...
p- just one minute, thank you.. and he hangs up.

 

[Troberg]

Well, as London->New York is travelling with the sun, chances are, time zones considered, that it will only take one minute.

 

[WAZUMBi]

 

[wonder]

 

[WAZUMBi]

Story of my life...

 

[Albi]

An old one but a lovely one:

My girlfriend: Go to the shop and get a loaf of bread. If they have eggs, get a dozen.
Me: Comes back with 12 loaves of bread.

It's a joke! (I don't really have a girlfriend).

 

[ilan]

This is how i fill sometimes when i code:

 

[Johan Schoeman]

Only me and God knew what I was trying to do with this piece of code, when I wrote it with no comments. Now only God knows...

***************************************************************

Why do computer programmers confuse Halloween with Christmas?
Because Oct 31 = Dec 25

***************************************************************

99 little bugs in the code
99 bugs in the code
patch one down, compile it around
138 bugs in the code

***************************************************************

Can you believe Mozart wrote his 1785 Piano Concerto No. 21 in C? I can't imagine compiling back then!

****************************************************************

Project Manager is a person who thinks nine women can deliver a baby in one month.

****************************************************************

One programmer asks another, "Can I borrow $1000?" The other programmer says "Why don't we make it an even $1024?"

***************************************************************


#define TRUE 0
#define FALSE 1
// Happy debugging!

 

[RandomCoder]

Only me and God knew what I was trying to do with this piece of code, when I wrote it with no comments. Now only God knows...

I particularly like this one! Who's not been in this situation? I always, always, comment my code but even then it's sometimes not enough

 

[wonder]

This is how i fill sometimes when i code:

View attachment 33781

Yep, we've all been there... Specially when it works when it shouldn't!

 

[stari]

Only me and God knew what I was trying to do with this piece of code, when I wrote it with no comments. Now only God knows...

***************************************************************

Why do computer programmers confuse Halloween with Christmas?
Because Oct 31 = Dec 25

***************************************************************

99 little bugs in the code
99 bugs in the code
patch one down, compile it around
138 bugs in the code

***************************************************************

Can you believe Mozart wrote his 1785 Piano Concerto No. 21 in C? I can't imagine compiling back then!

****************************************************************

Project Manager is a person who thinks nine women can deliver a baby in one month.

****************************************************************

One programmer asks another, "Can I borrow $1000?" The other programmer says "Why don't we make it an even $1024?"

***************************************************************


#define TRUE 0
#define FALSE 1
// Happy debugging!

#define as humor = true

 

[stari]

As Johan say: Now only God knows... as Boolean Now only God knows... = FALSE

I particularly like this one! Who's not been in this situation? I always, always, comment my code but even then it's sometimes not enough

 

[eurojam]

When I show the boss that I have finally fixed this bug: