Oooh, it's simple: you just delete entries from the husband and keep those from the wife...life soon becoming easier..eheeh
Sorry, I had a long and busy day so some jocking was due.
Back to your question. You could have a server receiving data from both devices and pushing updates toward them. Or an MQTT service where each time one of the partners clear a point on the list, it pushes a message to alert the other one. Even Firebase messaging could be used this way.